With attention spans growing shorter, and technology distractions growing faster, the challenge becomes not so much how to grab the readers attention (with curiosity triggers), but to keep it to the end of the piece.
Often credited to Mark Twain: “If I had more time, I’d have written a shorter letter.”
Once your draft feels “publication ready” set it aside for a few days, then go over it again. Read it out loud. This can reveal awkward sentences, extraneous words, places where you have “told” (He was angry) that need to be rewritten to “show” (his face growing redder by the second , he punched his fist through the wall).
Next, look for sentences that can be rephrased to make them shorter. Look for words that can be eliminated without losing meaning.
EXAMPLE:
*Original Google Quote
According to an anecdote published in 1918 Woodrow Wilson was asked about the amount of time he spent preparing speeches: “That depends on the length of the speech,” answered the President. “If it is a ten-minute speech it takes me all of two weeks to prepare it; if it is a half-hour speech it takes me a week; if I can talk as long as I want to it requires no preparation at all. I am ready now.”
A Tightened Version
A 1918 President Woodrow Wilson anecdote quoted him on the amount of time he spent preparing speeches: “That depends on the length of the speech. If it is a ten-minute speech it takes me two weeks to prepare; if it is a half-hour speech it takes me a week; if I can talk as long as I want it requires no preparation at all. I am ready now.”
The original quote has 80 words. The “tightened” version has 70 words. 10 words eliminated with no lose of meaning.
Here’s what I did:
According to an [A] 1918 [President] Woodrow Wilson anecdote quoted him was asked about on the amount of time he spent preparing speeches: “That depends on the length of the speech,” answered the President. “If it is a ten-minute speech it takes me all of two weeks to prepare it; if it is a half-hour speech it takes me a week; if I can talk as long as I want to it requires no preparation at all. I am ready now.”
When tightening your own writing look for little words like the, it, and, so, but, which can often be eliminated with no loss of meaning. The shorter the piece looks, the more likely it will be read.
After each round of tightening continue setting the draft aside for a few days then returning until you cannot find anything left to cut.
Now you are ready to publish!
NOTE: At some point good enough is good enough. Believe it or not after I had tightened this post to my extreme satisfaction, when I pasted the word doc into the blog, did the formatting, then previewed the draft, I found more stuff to cut! If you find more things to cut, let me know!
*http://quoteinvestigator.com/2012/04/28/shorter-letter/
What do you think? Leave a comment and let me know. If you have a short paragraph you’d like feedback on, leave that in the comments too. Keep on writing!
Jennifer the Editor
Helping people with a book inside them . . . get it OUT!
Ghostwriting – Editing – Manuscript Evaluations
http://JenniferTheEditor.org
Jennifer@JenniferTheEditor.org
